"Big Girls Don't Cry" is my favorite Fergie song. I love her voice anyways, but this song never fails to reach my heart. It is a mantra I have lived by for quite awhile.
I get very emotional about things and it really doesn't take a lot to make me cry; if I'm scared, upset, angry, or just overwhelmed I tend to cry. But I also have a lot of control issues and crying happens to be one of them. If someone makes me cry it freaks me out because I'm not in control. So when I was about 15 I taught myself not to cry unless I really had to. It actually worked for a pretty long time. Then somehow I started having a normal range of emotions again and the crying came back.
When I had the baby, something in my head told me that moms don't cry. So I really haven't. There has been a time or two, but nothing like it was.
With all of the drama that has been going on right now, I haven't cried. I have gotten pretty good at suppressing the urge and I like the feeling of control. I know this is not how my emotions are supposed to work and that I am probably messing up my emotional cycles, but, its my coping mechanism.